Editor,
Marriage has always been more than a union between two individuals. It is a bond between families, clans, and communities. Across cultures, the exchange of gifts during marriage has symbolised gratitude, respect, and celebration.
In some traditions, the bride’s family offers gifts. In others, the groom’s family presents animals, food, ornaments, or wealth.
Historically, these exchanges were never meant to be transactions. They were gestures of goodwill – acknowledgment of the value of relationships and the importance of unity.
However, history also shows that customs can change over time. In several societies, voluntary gifts gradually became expectations. Expectations slowly turned into obligations. And obligations, in some cases, became social pressure. What once symbolised love and honour began to measure status and wealth.
When that shift happens, the meaning of tradition quietly changes.
Marriage celebrations become more expensive. Families feel compelled to ‘match standards’. A practice rooted in respect risks turning into competition.
The issue is not whether gifts flow from one side or the other. The direction of exchange is less important than the spirit behind it. A tradition remains beautiful only when it is voluntary, balanced, and guided by mutual understanding.
Communities must occasionally pause and reflect: Are we preserving or increasing cost? Are we strengthening relationships or creating pressure? Are we honouring culture or competing in its name?
Customs survive not simply because they are old, but because each generation chooses to protect their true purpose. Cultural practices must evolve with wisdom, ensuring they remain symbols of unity rather than sources of strain.
Marriage should begin with dignity and joy, not financial anxiety. If traditions are guided with care and moderation, they will continue to enrich society. If not, even well-intentioned customs may lose their essence over time.
The strength of any culture lies not in rigidly repeating the past, but in thoughtfully preserving its spirit for the future.
Anonymous