‘Psychological affect’ of court case

Dear Editor,
As a fresher who graduated this year,I feel the commission has failed to provide a level playing field to a candidate like me as the environment for preparation has not been conducive to give my best effort owing to the never ending legal tussle going on right after the prelim result declaration.
For a candidate like me, the limited period of two odd months for mains preparation has been a challenge in itself thanks to the vast syllabus and lack of prior experience in such competitive exam.As such,I needed to give my 100% effort to stand a chance of cracking the mains. But unfortunately the ongoing court case has taken a heavy toll on my preparation because I have not been able to shield myself from its ‘psychological affect’.
I have been thinking every now and then as to what will happen to my hard earned opportunity to sit for mains if the high court declares the whole exam null and void and directs for a fresh exam after so much of hard work. Such thoughts adversely impacted my preparation process and I think it’s natural for a fresher like to get intimidated in such situation where you never know what is next.
Now some may ask why did I follow the court case developments? Why did not I just focus on the exam? Was not the condition same for every aspirant?
Well, my answer would be the ongoing court case outcome is not going to decide the fate of only the aggrieved candidates but the prelims qualifiers as well. So obviously because of this emotional attachment I have been closely following the case.
Moreover, I am an ordinary guy unlike those superman types who has been immune to all these happenings.
Of course, for senior players it may not have had any adverse affect on their preparation as they have already given so many attempts and as a result they don’t have to put in as much effort as a fresher to cover the syllabus. In fact, for them it’s a kind of revision only. Needless to say, mental pressure on them would not be significant.
In this context, I feel that my right to equality has not been taken care of by the commission since it’s their obligation to ensure that a conducive environment for preparation prevails for every candidate irrespective of freshers or seniors otherwise the concept of level playing field takes a back seat and undue advantage is tilted towards the senior players.
I hope I have been able to put across the agony of the fresher.
A prelim qualified fresher