[ Nellie N Manpoong ]
The good old days and ways of dating have been replaced by online dating apps that try to convince us that love does not require daily communication, and that the love of our life is probably some 100-200 kms away from our current location; sometimes even farther away.
Now, that would make for a wonderful new-age romance story, but if we make comparisons between what’s on the apps with our real, daily lives, it is mostly a recipe for disaster.
Sadly, most dating apps that have been developed with the intention of making two interested people meet have also earned the reputation of being solely for the purpose of ‘hooking up’. While that may not be the case with everyone, there are several who are lurking around these apps for just that. Apart from the target group of single men and women, several committed or married people are found using such apps.
While most married persons claim they use these apps to distract themselves and confide in a stranger without the fear of being judged, single men and women are using the apps to set some sort of speed-dating record.
Most men are seeking someone they can date without the promise of a commitment, while the search of women may vary between finding a soul mate to finding someone who can buy them a few drinks.
A 35-year-old male user who wants a relationship has been warned by his married friends about the agonies of tying the knot.
“Every time I sit with my married friends, they say how lucky I am to not be tied down. I do want a relationship, but then I am reminded of what they say. I will be tied down by responsibilities and will end up complaining like them,” he says.
Another man says he’s there only to flirt around and date as many women as possible. These men continue to use the apps in hopes of finding short-term dating partners, and sometimes only to share their thoughts and feelings with a complete stranger.
On the other hand, women who are seeking something serious say that men rarely see beyond the first few dates.
“Men have the upper hand in relationships these days. They want all the perks of a relationship, but back out as soon as we ask where the relationship is heading,” says a user, who has now given up using the apps.
Notably, not all women are looking for a relationship in these apps, either.
“I am simply looking for a decent time. If a man is eager to buy me drinks or take me out for coffee, I am down for that. There’s no harm in meeting new people,” says a female user.
Each user has their reasons for using dating apps – some good, some bad. What people need to remember is that the person on the other end of the phone is more than their filtered photos and well-thought-out text messages.
Perhaps we need to set our intentions straight before we use a dating app, because, truly, there is nothing wrong with these apps – except for those who use them. And if you are a user with intentions of meeting your online match, give the old school way a try.
However, if you are interested in finding a date for your dog, you might want to visit woofr_love.